I did warn you in the last blog about what would happen at this time of year but it seems some of you didn’t pay attention and were caught off guard and now look whats happened. Here are a few of this years early casualties caught in the act. Lets hope these are a lesson to the rest of you, so make sure you’re on your guard at all times and if you are like me, you will have several escape plans worked out well in advance. It’s worth remembering that humans can be very devious and cunning, so don’t be tricked into the obvious one of being tempted with a treat or your fate will be sealed before you know it.
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If however, there are some of you out there who enjoy being dressed up, then if you want to send me a photo I will put it on my gallery. Just email it to info@countrydogwalkers.co.uk and all your poochy friends can see you.
As part of being prepared for the festivities, here are my 12 rules of Christmas to help things run smoothly ;
1. First and foremost….. Xmas is all about ME!!!!!
2. If someone is stupid enough to dress up in a red suit and cotton wool and scare the hell out of me in the middle of the night, then of course I’m going to bite him.
3. If you think it was Santa and his reindeer who ate all the milk and cookies you left out then all well and good.
4. If wrapping wasn’t meant to be ripped into a million pieces then it would be made of stronger stuff wouldn’t it?
5. I can’t read so in my eyes, EVERY present is for me!
6. I’m not sat in front of the oven door staring at the turkey because I’m greedy, I’m just trying to keep warm.
7. Instead of saying “get back, get back” constantly, why not just swap the hinges on the oven door to the other side, then I won’t be in the way will I?
8. If it falls on the floor then it’s mine.
9. If it even looks like it might fall to the floor, I’ll catch it.
10. If you ever try to palm me off with sprouts I’ll bite you.
11. If I’m not laid on the floor in a big heap then I’m NOT full.
12. If all else fails, whine constantly until you breach their resistance (normally 2-3 mins).
I don’t know about the rest of you but what I really want this year is one of those new fangled hoverboards. After all, I am getting on in years now and the skateboard is getting too much like hard work! If I don’t get one then I’ll just annoy Pete & Sue by constantly playing with my squeaky toys until I get one…...yes, I DO know where you’ve hidden them!
That’s about it for now so I wish all my friends a very merry christmas and remember, when all else fails, whine, whine and whine some more!!
WOOF WOOF.
As part of being prepared for the festivities, here are my 12 rules of Christmas to help things run smoothly ;
1. First and foremost….. Xmas is all about ME!!!!!
2. If someone is stupid enough to dress up in a red suit and cotton wool and scare the hell out of me in the middle of the night, then of course I’m going to bite him.
3. If you think it was Santa and his reindeer who ate all the milk and cookies you left out then all well and good.
4. If wrapping wasn’t meant to be ripped into a million pieces then it would be made of stronger stuff wouldn’t it?
5. I can’t read so in my eyes, EVERY present is for me!
6. I’m not sat in front of the oven door staring at the turkey because I’m greedy, I’m just trying to keep warm.
7. Instead of saying “get back, get back” constantly, why not just swap the hinges on the oven door to the other side, then I won’t be in the way will I?
8. If it falls on the floor then it’s mine.
9. If it even looks like it might fall to the floor, I’ll catch it.
10. If you ever try to palm me off with sprouts I’ll bite you.
11. If I’m not laid on the floor in a big heap then I’m NOT full.
12. If all else fails, whine constantly until you breach their resistance (normally 2-3 mins).
I don’t know about the rest of you but what I really want this year is one of those new fangled hoverboards. After all, I am getting on in years now and the skateboard is getting too much like hard work! If I don’t get one then I’ll just annoy Pete & Sue by constantly playing with my squeaky toys until I get one…...yes, I DO know where you’ve hidden them!
That’s about it for now so I wish all my friends a very merry christmas and remember, when all else fails, whine, whine and whine some more!!
WOOF WOOF.
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